What are you?

[Qristina Zavačková Cummings]

I was asked today, "what are you?" when I was talking about Rroma. They said, no no, there are no Romanians here. I said no, I am Rroma. So, I had to explain gypsy.

They told me "you don't look like one, you can't be one". I argue for an hour that my ethnicity is what I say it is.

I am not used to that. In Europe people hate me openly for being prostitute dirty thieving gypsy. Here in US people think I "died out" or don't exist. Or worst still, I am a ... Disney character with a tambourine and a goat.

Sometimes I am so tired I want to hide forever. So I am pharnavi, but it isn't anyone else's business why.

I feel so hurt by it all tonight. Having to explain about the Porajmos and being called anti-semitic, having to tell people constantly that I am not "gypsy" but Rroma. Also, when people joke and say "Did you steal my wallet? it was here a minute ago!" when they don't mean it.

I'm tired.